Married, but confused. What to do?

You aren't happy. It's okay, it happens. When you're not happy with someone it means you should leave. You also said you felt calm and relaxed on the flight, I'm guessing she wasn't there with you.. but by the looks of it you're so much more happier without her. The only reason she is being nice is because she's trying to suck up to you. But if none of the counseling is working then there's no point in being with her.